Mustard on the Hedge

Is it wrong to envy a dog?

Girls Aloud singer, Cheryl Cole

Producers of the British soap opera, Hollyoaks, have revealed that it will feature a lesbian storyline next week. Hopefully it will be longer and better than the recent “blink and you’ll miss it” lesbian kiss on Ireland’s RTE.

According to the spoilers, after a string of bad relationship with men, model Sarah Barnes (actress Loui Batley) ends up in a heated embrace with her dad’s girlfriend Zoe Carpenter (Zoe Lister) after a drunken night out. Classy huh? It gets better. The pair are away on a trip for one of Sarah’s modeling gigs and get drunk and end up in bed together back at their B&B. Not even a hotel. A B&B! Another boundary busting lesbian scene no doubt.

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Former tennis champion, Martina Navratilova, is currently sitting in an Australian jungle. The 52 year old signed up as a contestant on the UK reality TV show “I’m a Celebrity, Get me Out of Here”. I caught an episode the other night and was impressed- she was really likable and I’d say she has a good chance of winning.

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My shoe collection would not be seen in the stylish shoe racks of Miss Carrie Bradshaw. Personally I don’t believe in buying furniture for your shoes and so I live sans-rack and my shoes sit merrily in a mound in the corner of my room. I doubt the girls at Vogue would like them to feature in their ‘feet chic’ spread.

Here’s how my ‘collection’ lines (or piles) up:

• One pair of Converse All Stars
• One pair of brown boots (round toe…my little sister tells me this is sooo uncool!)
• Two pairs of Converse-esque shoes
• Four pairs of runners (sneakers for US readers)
• One pair of slingback peeptoe shoes (bought to begrudgingly attend a black tie ball earlier this year)
• One pair of black Hush Puppie boots
• One pair of black Hush Puppie shoes (yes I like Hush Puppie’s…they practically kiss your feet as you walk!)

I hate to shoe shop. I am highly adept at haemorraging money in Foot Locker or any other casual footwear mecca but I dread having to buy “proper shoes”. Last week I had to brave the shops in search of what my gf calls “Bette clothes” and “appropriate” shoes in which to strut confidently into my new workplace. After sweating buckets and trying on shoes I felt obligated to like, I finally found a pair that didn’t make me feel like I’d have to harness the power of Chi in order to walk in them.

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Greetings all from my new place of employment. I started a new job yesterday- which explains my lack of blog action over the past couple of days. Never fear- I’ve bought my new swish “I DO know what I’m talking about” suits and my ‘girly’ shoes and I’ve shmoozed my new co-workers so expect me to be back in the saddle later today and I’ll fill you in on all my news!

Obviously I’m not alone with my thing for girls with guitars- that’s if the latest adverts for the Guitar Hero World Tour are anything to go by- first there was the Heidi Klum video and now this one with November’s Playmate, Grace Kim. Did you know that she’s the first Korean centrefold in Playboy history!? Check it out

http://www.veoh.com/videos/v16342939ChtgE6Ga