Mustard on the Hedge

So it’s freezing cold and every radio station and newspaper columnist is talking about how we’ll be on a diet of gruel or, on special occasions, bread and dripping, before Summer. Never fear. Lindsay Lohan has brought some cheer to an otherwise gloomy morning….well if you’re a LiLo fan that is.

She wrote on her MySpace blog:

“little piece of TRUE information:

we did NOT break up!”

Romance is alive and well and it’s thrashing hotel rooms!

The saga continues…Access Hollywood is reporting that Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson have broken up. To be honest I’m hoping this isn’t true. I was kinda rooting for the pair of them to defy the odds, withstand the paparazzi and endless gossip and ride off into the sunset on white horses between Ellen and Portia.

However it looks like Lindsay may be riding solo from now on. The infamous ’source close to the couple’ said that Lindsay has packed up her old kit bag and moved out of the house she shared with Ronson.

Lindsay’s sister Ali Lohan is supposed to be moving in with her to support her through the breakup. She’ll probably need the support as she’s being painted as ‘the crazy redhead’ Cruella DeVille character in this story…driving poor Samantha to literal exhaustion. Mmm…From what I can see since the couple confirmed their relationship, Lohan has said she loves Samantha and ‘cares about her deeply’. She’s been by her side through all her gigs and they seemed happy. That said is there ever smoke without Firecrotch?

Lindsay stated adamantly that if the pair ever broke up she’d declare it on her MySpace blog and there hasn’t been a peep out of her yet. Fingers crossed she’ll come out and say it’s all just bullshit.

When it comes to Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson there is always some debate raging in the media. First it was the ‘is she or isn’t she’ saga. Then the ‘is it a publicity stunt’ debate. And , most recently, the media decided to analyse every facet of the relationship and await its demise as the ‘they’re on the verge of splitting up’ stories hit the press on a weekly basis.

Photo by: KCSPresse / Splash News Online

Christmas can be a tough time for relationships. Spending Christmas Day apart or with your in-laws can make anyone turn to the mulled wine for comfort or fling some brussel sprouts at a particularly annoying relative. If you believe what you read it’s been a tough Christmas for Firecrotch. As well as having to deal with every aspect of her relationship being media fodder, she has to deal with her ‘peach’ of a dad who took a break from trying to attack Sam over Christmas to drop a bombshell on the family. Lindsay wrote on her blog:

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Just in case you didn’t catch it, here’s an extract from Britney’s appearance on the Ellen show recently:

What’s the difference between celebrities and us mere spokes in the wheel of life? While it’s Winter and bitterly cold, we’re dressing up in our winter woolies and all manner of ludicrous hats in an effort to stave off frost bite, they are taking all their clothes off and making millions in the process!!

Yesterday I wrote about Jessica Biel’s new movie and her photoshoot for mens mag GQ. Well today’s nipples on show are those of Marissa Tomei! The 44 year old Brooklyn girl is best known for her roles in the movies “My Cousin Vinny” and “In the Bedroom”- both of which earned her an Oscar for ‘Best Supporting Actress’.

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7th Heaven was a dose of sickly sweetness that I’d occassionally flick past on a Sunday evening…I never saw any need to stop and watch. If I wanted a lesson in morals and realising the consequences of my actions I’d tune into one of the soaps. Clearly I made a grave error if Jessica Biel looked like this in the show:

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